I am a conspiracy theorist.
The statement will not be startling to those who know me. For decades I have privately and publicly spoken to thousands of people on matters that to many seem somewhat insane. I do not believe in many of the theories that I speak about. I have been and will be fascinated by the thought process, creation of and continuation of conspiracy theories. I am a conspiracy theorist because I consider theories about conspiracies.
My goal as a theorist, archivist, researcher has been to share differing ideas on historical events so that a larger group of people may be able to lift the veil on misunderstood and controversial topics. I also hope that in the process of speaking to people, (since I by no means believe that I have all the answers), that together we can construct new and wonderful ways of thinking that individually we could not have developed.
When I began doing public lectures, whether they were on political assassinations or moon-landing hoaxes, I fought to create an air of normality in a community which has mostly been regarded as “kooky.” I tried to explain, to those who misconstrued the concept of “conspiracy theorist” as nut-balls, that I was simply a part of a community that asked questions and demand answers. Yes, every group has “nut-balls, kooks and radicals” but most of us were intelligent, rational, creative thinkers who were trying to elevate the thinking of, not only our own community but, the whole world.
Time has passed.
I was wrong.
The Modern Conspiracy Promoters
I have watched as conspiracy theorists have become insane. Like any money making venture those who scream the loudest, act the silliest and take arms, sometimes violently, are elevated to positions of leadership. There is no official conspiracy community, but make no mistake, people have become leaders. Their data may be flawed, but they have media access. They may not believe the beliefs they profess but they are on the radio, TV and internet professing them. When news channels, documentarians and television shows need a conspiracy theorist, they go to the people who have radio shows and media access. They go to the de facto-leaders of the community.
I don’t want to be a leader. Some people might think I am jealous that other people have burst onto the scene and made a name for themselves, as well as a great deal of money, but be sure I don’t want to be a leader.
The reason I became fascinated with conspiracies in the first place was because I felt as though the events of my life were under the power of some unseen controller, it was actually my parents. I hated being under the thumb of cliques, school administration and employers.
I don’t want to be a leader. I wanted to be the boss of me, the only person I desire to lead is myself. But even now I know that if I lead myself I can lead myself in the wrong direction with no hope of asking anyone else if they know a way out.
People want to be led
Conspiracy theorist constantly talk about the masses of the population being “sheep” following the orders of elected officials or wealthy robber-barons. They get these ideas reinforced by the leaders of their own community. “DON’T BELIEVE THE STORY AS IT IS BEING TOLD!” shout the leaders of the conspiracy theorists, “HEAR THE REAL STORY FROM ME!” which usually means buying a DVD or a product from a sponsor of their radio or YouTube show. “Support the speakers of truth!” they scream, except the ones you don’t like or have a different “truth”. It’s solely money-grabs and power plays made by the elite, the secret elite, the underground elite and the elite that explains which elite is the elitist.
One of the reasons that people question me so heavily about my ideas may well be because the ideas I expound sometimes sound new, fresh and interesting. It is because they are mostly MY ideas. Formed by long nights of consideration from conversations with people of varying lifestyles and opinions. And when I end a lecture I say. “Don’t believe anything I’ve said”
I just want people to think. I want them to think openly, honestly, deeply and with some amount of clarity.
I do not want anyone hurt or to be killed. I do not wish death on my worst enemy, thankfully I don’t have any (known) enemies. I am passionate about my research and more so about the concept that we as a people can find answers. I do not agree with certain politicians but I do not want them killed. I find fault with certain religions, I do not want them abolished. I love the world in which I live and I do not want it destroyed. Thinking is a beautiful part of the human condition and I wish more people would do it.
I now, regard most of the people in the “Conspiracy Community” as crazy or at the least ill-informed. Not because of what they believe but because of how they act.
We often hear about the quieter segments of our society referred to as “Sheep”. Yes, sheep may be easily herded into pens, following blindly in any direction… but they also bleat incredibly loud and most of the time it is because they are confused, scared and not intelligent enough to know what is going on.
At least sheep are not cruel. Sheep cannot wish death on other sheep. They do not demand other sheep be slaughtered first or purposefully push other sheep into the killing rooms because they are different sheep.
Unfortunately in those last two examples people are most definitely not sheep.
The squeaky wheel gets the grease, but it is also the first wheel to be replaced.
Don’t believe anything I’ve said.